Since 1982, Dr. Michael Elterman has owned and operated a private clinical psychology practice in the Vancouver area. He has also collaborated extensively with the courts, preparing over 2,500 reports regarding such issues as child development, custody issues, and child abuse.
Aside from glaringly obvious indications such as cigarette burns or very specific bruising patterns, it can be difficult to know when a child is suffering abuse. Though no one of these on its own serves as definitive proof, radical changes or a combination of signs, such as those I list below, might necessitate intervention from an adult.
Obvious physical damage: It is no secret that children often play a bit too rough and end up with bruises and scrapes. But if these injuries repeat, or a child starts to act suspicious (i.e., wearing long sleeves and pants every day), it might be worth investigating.
Inappropriate behavior, seemingly out of nowhere: Some of these incidences can be chalked up to self-exploration, but if a change occurs that makes you feel uneasy (i.e., a pre-adolescent child obsessed with private zones, or a formerly mellow child abruptly starting to act out), look into it.
Extremely low self-image: Children who have been abused tend to be, if not explicitly told by the abuser, made to feel inadequate or useless. Children who constantly say things like “What’s the point? I’m stupid anyway” or generally express very little self-worth might be the victims of abuse.
Drastic fluctuations in personality: Though a child suffering abuse may play with his classmates normally and appear content most of the time, this may be a defense mechanism. A victim of abuse might vacillate between a content, surface persona and an anxious, depressed side that sometimes shows through.
Objects fervently to going somewhere: Instead of forcing a child who strongly resists visiting a particular person, communicate with the child. Ask questions to uncover the real reason the child does not want to go. Children may be afraid to tell the truth, as children who suffer abuse often withhold it to protect the abuser if the abuser is a perceived caretaker.
Dr. Michael Elterman 